I have spent the better part of the past few days looking at "thinspo/ pro ana/ pro mia" blogs. And I gotta admit: none of them fit my needs. Most of them are teenage girls who are looking up to these stick thin models who have less than 7% body fat. They post pictures of these women who are so skinny you can count every bone in their body.
I have never had the need to look at my thighs and say "my leg bone is way too fat". And I severely hope I never get to that point either.
But here's the start of my journey. It's going to be rocky and I know that I will probably protest most of the way. However, I need to start somewhere. And I'm taking the first steps in the direction I want to go: to be thin.
My starting weight is 306. (ugh, what a disgusting number. Only 4 pounds less of what I weighed when I gave birth nearly 3 years ago)
Highest weight: 326 ( I will never, EVER be that big again. Ever)
Short Term Goal weight: 280 by July 20th 2013
Long Term Goal weight: 190
You may ask how I'm going to achieve my goals: easy. I'm not going to eat. Anorexia? Not necessiarily. I am planning on staying below 700cals per day. But I am going tomorrow with an all day fast. I'll tell my husband that I'm not feeling well. That'll get him off my back so I can concentrate on trying to drop those last 6 LBS before we go on our little camping adventure.
I need to do this. I cannot stand to look in the mirror. The rolls, dimples, stretch marks---they are disgusting. They do not belong on my body. I want to be able to see my feet again!
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